People often say to me, "Wow, you're a divorce lawyer! How can you do what you do?"
After all these years, I've given the answer a lot of thought, and I've come to this realization: In a real sense we are purveyors of people's happiness, because when people come to see me, they are not happy.
I ask those questions because I - as your advocate and representative - have to know what you want. They are important and basic questions. If you don't know what you want, you will end up with what someone else wants you to have. I am a big believer in everyone taking personal responsibility for managing their own lives, and only their own lives.
Often, my clients are upset about the decisions made by other people - decisions that have admittedly directly impacted them. As I tell my clients, we can't change those decisions. They are part of yesterday. Now it's time for us to focus on today, on what choices are yours to make, and make only those choices that are yours to make.
So to some extent it is an exercise, a process. Where do you want to go next with your life and how do you want to get there? What's a realistic scenario, based on one's budget and outlook? By the time the process is over, most are healthier for it.
Our firm has broad expertise, but each attorney handles their own cases. We are each hands-on throughout the entire case, to a greater degree, I think, than most firms. I am not one to delegate. I am also focused on our immediate area - Fauquier, Rappahannock, Culpeper, and Loudoun counties. I know the legal communities well here, including the judges. I doubt you'll ever find me trying a case in downtown Washington.
Most cases will resolve themselves before ever going to trial. In fact, all cases have their own optimum time to settle. I always start on the settlement track by looking at what meets the needs of the parties involved. If it doesn't work, though, we have to ask, what is the court likely to do? How would a judge rule on this? My experience enables me to anticipate very well these days what the outcome would be in court.
My work and my career have evolved right along with our communities. When I started practice, we'd know almost everyone on the jury list. There was a small-town feeling. Nowadays it's less likely that we'll know very many people on the jury list.
For years I remarked that domestic relations lawyers were the red-headed step-children of the law. But today three of our firm's ten lawyers focus on domestic relations cases; it is a substantial and important part of our overall practice.
My work is very rewarding. I represent interesting people, from all walks of life. I've always been fascinated by the people I meet, and I'm always honored to help them - and work hard to purvey a little happiness again.
